Comments on: Makaan http://bhasadalaya.wordpress.com/2007/02/25/makaan/ writings of nitin gupta Tue, 27 Oct 2009 05:41:50 +0000 http://wordpress.com/ hourly 1 By: kowsik http://bhasadalaya.wordpress.com/2007/02/25/makaan/#comment-33 kowsik Mon, 26 Feb 2007 22:08:16 +0000 http://ngupta.com/2007/02/25/makaan/#comment-33 mujhe theory jyaada pata nahi hai, mera ek hi observation hai is post pe: I see that every paragraph has two contrasting moods, it starts in one mood and ends in another. Yes I have read your opinion on on-liner comments, so am adding this extra line: "dekho wo titan ki ghadi saamne waali table pe kal raat ko maine hi to wahan utaarkar rakhi thee" would you say it in such a casual manner if you had forgotten the watch to your office, and hence have been wondering where you forgot it? (I am assuming you are not someone with many wrist-watches) mujhe theory jyaada pata nahi hai, mera ek hi observation hai is post pe: I see that every paragraph has two contrasting moods, it starts in one mood and ends in another.

Yes I have read your opinion on on-liner comments, so am adding this extra line:
“dekho wo titan ki ghadi saamne waali table pe
kal raat ko maine hi to wahan utaarkar rakhi thee”

would you say it in such a casual manner if you had forgotten the watch to your office, and hence have been wondering where you forgot it? (I am assuming you are not someone with many wrist-watches)

]]> By: nitiniitk http://bhasadalaya.wordpress.com/2007/02/25/makaan/#comment-32 nitiniitk Mon, 26 Feb 2007 01:48:00 +0000 http://ngupta.com/2007/02/25/makaan/#comment-32 @Anonymous: Thanks for the frank analysis, I look forward to more free criticism from people rather than one-liner-compliments. My attempt was to capture native thoughts and observations, hence some english words and lack of tukbandi. Any resemblance to Raincoat is a coincidence as I haven't see the movie yet. Lack of depth is something I will try to work upon more in future ones. @Anonymous: Thanks for the frank analysis, I look forward to more free criticism from people rather than one-liner-compliments. My attempt was to capture native thoughts and observations, hence some english words and lack of tukbandi. Any resemblance to Raincoat is a coincidence as I haven’t see the movie yet. Lack of depth is something I will try to work upon more in future ones.

]]> By: Anonymous http://bhasadalaya.wordpress.com/2007/02/25/makaan/#comment-31 Anonymous Mon, 26 Feb 2007 00:30:47 +0000 http://ngupta.com/2007/02/25/makaan/#comment-31 Good attempt. Good setting up of the plot. But prompts to comment rather critically. The climax was rather obvious towards the end, may be because I know you. At one point it seems inspired from raincoat. As you know and may have done on purpose, it somewhat lags in literary beauty and fails to attain a certain depth. Again good attempt, though I appreciate some thought provoking strings better. Good attempt. Good setting up of the plot. But prompts to comment rather critically.

The climax was rather obvious towards the end, may be because I know you. At one point it seems inspired from raincoat. As you know and may have done on purpose, it somewhat lags in literary beauty and fails to attain a certain depth.

Again good attempt, though I appreciate some thought provoking strings better.

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